Dunlap Family Adoption » Bringing our little boy home from Ethiopia

saying goodbye

August 8, 2010 – 9:53 PM

We made it back to Nashville yesterday afternoon after 30 hours of traveling and about 21 hours on an airplane. While I miss being in Ethiopia, at this point I’m just really glad to be on the ground!

Friday was a tough day emotionally, but we made it and my heart is actually filled with peace. We headed over to Hannah’s Hope at 9:00 and played just like we did the other days. Our little guy was outside and ran to the van when he saw we were inside. Not long after that, however, he started acting very strangely. He was very clingy and didn’t want anything to do with Brad. He wanted me to carry him the whole time and didn’t want to play (which isn’t like him). He cried a little at one point, and Almaz came out and asked him if he wanted some new shoes. He did, so we went into the storage room, and he picked out a pair. He was SO proud of those shoes and strutted back out to the courtyard to show them off! He just kind of crept out there at first, looking down at them as he walked, and waited to see if any of the kids would notice. When they didn’t, he decided to call each child by name and pointed at them. It was so funny! After that, he was all better, and we had a good time.

* (These are his new shoes & his sweet little hand!)

When it was time for lunch, tears welled up in his eyes, and it was ALL I could do to hold mine in. He’s a smart little guy, and he’d figured out early on that we would leave soon after lunch was over. He finally stopped crying, and Brad and I fed him his lunch (injera and shiro wat). In Ethiopian culture, feeding someone shows that you love them, and I had kind of wanted to feed him all week long. He settled down, and we blew LOTS of bubbles and played soccer after lunch.

Because he had figured out that we are his parents earlier in the week, Almaz was honest with him when it was time for us to go. She told him that we were going back to America to get him some new clothes, some toys & some candy and that we would be back to take him home. He instantly looked sad and wouldn’t look us in the eyes. Almaz said that he agreed with the part about us bringing him new things but didn’t agree with us leaving. We loved on him, and I took his little face in my hands and gave him one last kiss. Then we got in the van. I somehow managed to hold it together until we backed out of the gate, and then I sobbed and did the ugly cry. I’ll never forget him turning to look at us as we backed out.

By the time we got back to the hotel, I suddenly felt a strange sense of peace and had stopped crying. That morning at Hannah’s Hope, Almaz had given us a disc of pictures of our little guy with his birth mom and little sister. When we got in our room, I popped the disc in my laptop. As we looked through all of the pictures and read the interview that was done with her, I just cried and cried. Honestly it was far more emotional than saying goodbye to him. I believe God allowed me to have perspective in that moment and realize that my goodbye was NOTHING in comparison to her goodbye. She said goodbye for forever, and I was only saying goodbye for a few weeks. Her pain was far more agonizing than the pain I felt. My heart broke again for her and for him. In the pictures, he looks so content and comfortable with her. He looks so happy. There are ones of just him and her and ones of him holding and kissing on his little sister. I just sat there and grieved for all of them and thanked God for her and her sacrifice. She loves him so much that she made the decision to let him go so he could live and thrive. She wasn’t able to provide for him, and so she made the choice to give him life. She most certainly did not abandon him. She made the hardest decision of her life because she loves him more than she loves herself. I’m so thankful that we have the pictures, and we will always treasure them and her.

We left the hotel around 4:30 and headed to the airport. As we drove there, I just couldn’t believe that our time was over. I began to realize how much I would miss being there. Our flight from Addis Ababa to Dubai left late, so we had the joy of sprinting through the Dubai airport trying to make our connecting flight to New York. Thankfully we made the final call and then ended up sitting on the runway for over an hour before flying off into the night sky toward the United States. After 14 hours on that plane, we landed in New York early yesterday morning. We felt soooo rough and were just ready to get home at that point. We made it back to Nashville around 1:30 PM and managed to stay awake until about 9:45 last night. It felt SO good to sleep in our bed and get a full 8 hours of sleep! We got Riley & Cole back this afternoon, and it was really good to be back together! It’s strange to know, though, that we have a son half way across the world, and I cannot wait until we’re all under one roof. I’ve thought about him so many times today and wondered what he was doing and what is going through that little head of his. We believe he really understood that we’re coming back, and I’m hoping he’ll trust that it’s true over the next days and weeks until we can get to him again.

We’re hoping to hear about our Embassy appointment this week, and then we’ll have a better idea about when we’ll travel back to Ethiopia. Stay tuned . . . I’ll keep you posted!

* (Almaz & me . . . she is so wonderful & we are thankful for her! My hair looked crazy all week because I fried my flat iron the second day we were there . . . oops!)

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Africa & Ethiopia, Family, News | 7 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

We have THREE boys!!!

August 5, 2010 – 2:57 PM

We found out this morning that our case was approved in court yesterday, so our little guy is legally our son now!!! We’re officially a family of FIVE! We had a good visit with him this morning. He was playing inside because it had rained, and he ran up to greet us when he realized we were in the room. We stayed for about 2.5 hours, and tears were streaming down his cheeks when we left – broke my heart. We’ll see him one last time tomorrow before we fly out later tomorrow evening. I can’t believe our time in Ethiopia is coming to a close already. The week has flown by, and tomorrow will be a hard day for sure. The group that was here last week before us already has travel dates for their second trip/Embassy appointment. They will be coming back in about TWO WEEKS! We don’t know yet if our second trip will happen as quickly, but we’re ready for our little man to be HOME and for our family to be under ONE roof!

Tonight we went to dinner with Wass at a traditional Ethiopian restaurant. It was a cultural experience for sure! There was a live band, and traditional dances were performed for entertainment. I’ll post a video from tonight here on the blog once we get home. We got to Skype with the big boys back home today, and it made me miss them! As incredibly hard as leaving will be, I’m really ready to see Riley and Cole! They’ve been such troopers throughout this whole process and especially during our time apart.

I’ll leave you with a few pictures from today. This is our hotel . . .

Wass & Brad . . .

There’s a lot of new construction going on in this part of town (and all over Addis Ababa really). The scaffolding is made out of wood . . .

There are goats, sheep, cows, donkeys & horses all over the place here! They just hang out beside or IN the roads and even nap while cars and people steadily pass by! At night they all leave the streets and go home!

This is Hannah’s Hope – such a wonderful place! I took a lot of pictures inside of the buildings today and will do a separate post on them sometime soon . . .

This is the van we’ve been riding around in all week. Wass has been a great chauffeur!Please pray for us as we say goodbye to our little boy tomorrow. I’m going to try REALLY, REALLY hard to not cry in front of him. I want his memories of our last day together to be happy ones. Pray that God fills his heart with peace and that we’re able to bring him home soon. We’ll fly out tomorrow evening and arrive back in Nashville Saturday afternoon. Thanks for following our journey as we’ve been in Ethiopia!

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Africa & Ethiopia, News | 7 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

court & pictures

August 4, 2010 – 3:56 PM

Wass (Hannah’s Hope staff) picked us up at the hotel this morning at 7:30 to drive downtown for our court appointment. We had some extra time, so we stopped by a CD store to pick up some traditional music from our son’s region. We also went to visit the largest church in Ethiopia (see pictures below). Then we headed to court, where Haile (our case processor) met us. We walked up four flights of stairs and into a small room lined with chairs where we waited for two hours. There were LOTS of people crowded into the little room at times, and we saw the couple I mentioned a few days ago from Texas that we met in the Dubai airport. It was good to see them again & hear about their visit with their babies! Finally we were called in, and we spent about 3 minutes sitting in front of the judge (a lady behind a little desk). She asked us some basic questions, and then we were done! We haven’t heard about the results of court yet, but hopefully Almaz will know something when we visit Hannah’s Hope tomorrow.

We then went with Wass to do some shopping at a little market area. We got several things, and one of them is a traditional outfit for our little man. It’s something that would be worn for a special occasion – like a wedding or holiday. I can’t wait to do a little photo shoot with him wearing it! We also bought some berbere and shiro (spices used for cooking Ethiopian food). After shopping, we went to lunch at Makush, an Italian restaurant, and then we came back to the hotel and rested some. It was a good day, but we’re really ready to get back to Hannah’s Hope to spend some more time with our little guy tomorrow. Here are some pictures from our day . . . enjoy!

. . . and this last one describes how we feel about our little boy . . . he is just . . .

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Africa & Ethiopia, News | 3 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

another great day!

August 3, 2010 – 12:58 PM

Today we woke up, got ready, ate breakfast & headed to Hannah’s Hope. I wasn’t feeling great, so I took some anti-nausea medicine right before we left. Thankfully it worked, and by the time we arrived about 10 minutes later, I felt good (SO thankful we decided to get that prescription filled the morning we left Nashville!).

We didn’t know how our little guy (it’s so hard to not use his name on here – can’t wait until we can!) would react to us, but he was really happy to see us again!!! I spotted him as the gate opened, and he ran up to the van as our driver pulled in with a huge grin on his face! He jumped up in Brad’s arms right away and didn’t want Brad to put him down. Then he came to me, and I sat down and held him for a while. He was facing me with his head on my chest, and he just hugged me and wouldn’t let go. It was an incredible feeling, and one that I’ll never ever forget!

We stayed at Hannah’s Hope for about 2.5 hours and decided to leave earlier than yesterday so he could nap. He seems to do really great until lunch time and then he gets tired and a little more sensitive and emotional. We pushed him in the swing for a while, played soccer (he only wanted to use the soccer ball we brought yesterday and not any of the other ones – sweet!), played with Play-Doh, blew bubbles, ate lunch, and read a book. After lunch he didn’t want to share us with the other kids and got upset and started crying when they interfered with our play time. Almaz came out and invited us to go sit with him and read to him on the porch. She also gave him a piece of candy, which never hurts with kids! His tears soon dried up, but he seemed tired so we decided to leave and let him take a nap (which is part of his typical schedule). Both days we’ve left, Almaz has made the transition by letting him pass out suckers to the kids, and that seems to distract him pretty well.

We noticed several things about him today: 1) He’s really observant and takes everything in around him. 2) He did NOT want to “squish” up his Play-Doh and wanted to leave it in the neat little block it was in when we opened it. We eventually “squished” up another color and let him hold both of them. He seems to want to hold onto whatever we give him so the other kids can’t get it! I’m sure we’ll have to work on sharing once he’s home and it’s the appropriate time. 3) He built a little tower with big legos and wanted to make sure we both saw it. He even carefully carried it to the other side of the courtyard to show it to Brad. We made a big deal out of it like we were really proud, and he just lit up! 4) He’s a good eater. Yesterday they had injera and gomen, and today that had pasta that looked kind of like spaghetti. He ate well with his fork and has good coordination. He likes to drink mango juice, too. 6) He’s pretty quiet around us and doesn’t talk much like some of his buddies. There are probably a lot of factors behind that, but he’s pretty good about communicating what he wants non-verbally. The language barrier is definitely tough at times. He does talk every now and then when he gets excited about something (like when we replayed the video we had taken of him – he just chatted away pointing to the screen and telling me all about it!).

We did some sightseeing yesterday so I decided to include a few pictures. It’s so hard to not post pictures of him or of our time at Hannah’s Hope (which is most of our pictures), but we can’t legally.

These were taken in the airport as we traveled over . . .

The first one of these was taken on our sightseeing trip yesterday. The second one is the view from our hotel window . . .

Inside of Sisay’s taxi & a view of the city from the highest point in Addis Ababa. It was really cloudy & rained, but it was still beautiful . . .

We went to a really nice traditional Ethiopian restaurant with Sisay after we toured the city. I think we’ll be going back here Thursday evening, too, with a couple of staff members from Hannah’s Hope. (That’s Sisay with Brad) . . . .

Well, I guess that’s it for today. It’s getting close to 9 PM here, and we have our court appointment tomorrow. Pray that it goes well. We’ve been told what to expect, and it’s not nearly as intimidating as I had imagined. After court, we’ll go out to lunch with a couple of Hannah’s Hope staff & then do some shopping. We’ll be back at Hannah’s Hope on Thursday & I think we might get to go back on Friday – I’m hoping so anyway! Thanks to everyone for your prayers!

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Africa & Ethiopia, Family, News | 10 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

WOW! WHAT A DAY!

August 2, 2010 – 2:31 PM

**Warning: this is an extremely long post . . . sorry!**

Okay, here goes. I’m tired and emotionally drained, but I’m going to try to put into words what today was like. We woke up this morning and started getting ready. I had always imagined that I’d be really nervous and anxious getting ready to meet our son, and I wasn’t. I was just really excited and very calm about the whole thing. I’m guessing that there must have been some prayers going out on our behalf for me to be that way! We ate breakfast downstairs at the hotel and then gathered fun things to take to Hannah’s Hope with us to use when playing with the kids.

At 9:30 Danny came to pick us up and take us to Hannah’s Hope. It’s close to the hotel (probably about 5 minutes away), and you turn off of the main road onto a really bumpy dirt road. Hannah’s Hope is amazing – so nice and very well-kept. We pulled up to the gate, Danny honked the horn, someone opened the gate, and there we were!

Brad spotted our little man right away. He was swinging on the far end of the swing set closest to where we pulled in. I saw him right after Brad did, and tears immediately welled up in my eyes. We didn’t get to meet him right away because we were escorted into the building to meet with Almaz, the director. I didn’t want to be that girl – the one who cries immediately – so I tried very hard to control my emotions!

We sat down in the office, and I spotted Isaac Young’s pictures on a billboard. Isaac just went home to be with his forever family a little over a month ago, and you might remember that we went to high school with his mom. She had taken the pictures (she’s an amazing photographer) and sent them to Hannah’s Hope with another traveling family. I loved seeing his pictures – all smiley – and knowing exactly who he was! Also, on a bookshelf, I spotted the files for all of the referred kids. Their names are written on the spine, and I saw so many familiar names from our AGCI listserve group. And get this – the child’s first name is written and then his/her new last name is on there! That made the tears start to flow again – knowing that those families are waiting to bring their babies home and knowing that those kids DO indeed have families! Almaz came in, and we met with her to discuss court, etc. for about 15 minutes. She’s just as wonderful as everyone always says – love her!

Then she took us out to meet our newest little family member. We were told that he wouldn’t know we were his parents and that we’d probably mostly play with him in a large group setting. However, when we walked out into the courtyard, he came walking out there all by himself. So, Almaz just said we could play with him there alone. It was AMAZING! She told him we were there to play, and he immediately ran to me and put his arms around my legs! I bent down and gave him a big hug. We had a good bit of one-on-one time with him – playing soccer, blowing bubbles, playing with trucks, swinging, etc. I couldn’t even believe we were there with him. It was even better than I had always imagined – totally exceeded my expectations as I had set them pretty low knowing he wouldn’t know exactly who we were.

Well, we think he kind of started figuring it out, and by the end of the day, he knew who we were. We were even being referred to as his “mama” and “papa.” It wasn’t supposed to work out that way, and I don’t know if it’s entirely the best thing, but Almaz said we’d “play it by ear,” and that’s how it played out.

He is just perfect for our family, and we think he’s going to fit right in. He did have a few moments where he seemed to get really sad and tears even flowed down his cheeks a couple of times. My heart completely broke for him. We sat with him while he ate lunch, and he wouldn’t even look at us. It was all I could do not to cry because my heart broke for him. After lunch, though, we went back out with him by ourselves, and he was fine and began to laugh and have fun again. We know that he will certainly have moments of sadness, and he seems to really be a “thinker.” We are just praying that God heals his little heart and gives him peace and joy in the midst of really uncertain times for him.

We stayed for four hours, and he cried when we left. Once again, I had to hold the tears in. I’m curious to see how he responds to us tomorrow. We love him to pieces, and we just couldn’t have asked for a better time with him. He’s so sweet and thoughtful and loving and sensitive. He likes to try to figure out how things work, he’s very observant, and he LOVES to PLAY! He played hard the entire time we were there, and I think he was exhausted when we left. He really enjoyed playing soccer with us, and he loved hitting the beach ball back and forth. He got a little pushy with the other kids when they tried to mess with “his” stuff, but Almaz said that’s completely normal (and I don’t know of any 3.5 year old who doesn’t do that anyway!). We can’t wait to bring him home!

This afternoon we also got a taxi and went out sightseeing for several hours. Our driver was Sisay, and he was very nice. We drove up to the highest point in the city (1000 feet above where we’re staying, which already has a high elevation) and looked out over Addis. We went to a small historic museum and then went to a restaurant and got some traditional Ethiopian food and coffee.

It’s been a busy, overwhelming day, but we’re extremely thankful and feel very blessed! Tomorrow morning we’ll go back to Hannah’s Hope for a few hours, and then we might just relax at the hotel, as the rest of our week is pretty busy. Thanks so much for the prayers and support! It’s getting late here, so we’re off to sleep! More to come tomorrow if we get the chance . . .

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Family, News | 9 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

WE MADE IT!

August 1, 2010 – 2:23 PM

We made it to Addis Ababa around 11:30 AM today after 21 hours of flight time and an overnight stay in Dubai. A couple of highlights so far:

1) We met Brian & Tracy (sorry if I misspelled your names) in the airport in Dubai this morning. They’re adopting siblings, and they live in Texas. He’s a pastor, and she is a photographer AND our kids are from the same region in Ethiopia – LOTS in common! We don’t know if we’ll run into them when we both attend court on Wednesday, but we hope to see them again. Either way, we’ll be sure to keep in touch! (I’ll post a link to their blog later. For some reason I can’t get it to link now).

2) Most families with our agency travel with a group. This just means that several AGCI families are here at the same time, and they get to walk through this phase of the process together. We, however, are here alone. While I was a little disappointed about that at first, we’ve also been looking forward to hanging out together – just the two of us. We’ve been so busy lately that spending all this time together gives us a chance to reconnect and talk about our plans for attachment and bonding, etc. once we get our little guy home. There were about 10 AGCI couples here last week, and we were very excited to be able to have lunch at the hotel with the last couple left before they flew out later in the day. They told us about their experiences and what to expect – super nice! Thank you, Michael & Leslie, for making sure to find us! We really appreciate it!

Tomorrow morning at 9:30 AM we will go to Hannah’s Hope and meet our little boy for the first time! We’ll try to update the blog as much as we can, so stay tuned! Here we are early this morning in our hotel room in Dubai:

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Africa & Ethiopia, News | 3 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

leavin’ on a jet plane

July 30, 2010 – 10:23 AM

Well, today’s the day we’ve been waiting for . . . we’re going to Ethiopia!!! We booked our flights three weeks ago, and those three weeks have FLOWN by.

Here’s an idea of what we think our schedule will be like while we’re gone:

Friday – Fly to Houston and then fly 15 hours to Dubai
Saturday – Arrive in Dubai that evening and spend the night
Sunday – Fly to Addis Ababa early that morning. Hang out at hotel & stand amazed the rest of the day that we’re actually there!
Monday – Go to Hannah’s Hope around 1:30 & meet our little boy for the first time! Play with him and the other kids for a few hours
Tuesday – Spend a few more hours at Hannah’s Hope
Wednesday – Attend our court appointment & testify that we certainly DO want him to be our son!
Thursday – Spend a few more hours at Hannah’s Hope & say goodbye until the next trip . . . {tears}
Friday – Soak in our last day in Addis Ababa and fly out that evening to Dubai
Saturday – Fly from Dubai to New York to Nashville . . . home!

We got everything packed last night, and I got so excited about all of the donations we’re taking to Hannah’s Hope! I was excited before, but to see it all ready to go was really fun! We tried to pack very light ourselves so that we could fit in as much as possible, and we were able to take almost everything! The few things that didn’t fit will be saved until the next trip. Thank so much to those of you who contributed! It was neat to see how a little here and a little there added up to be A LOT! This is just some of it . . .

Please pray that our flights go smoothly, that all of our bags arrive when we do, and that we’re able to soak in everything while we’re there. We’ve grown to love Ethiopia, and we know that experiencing the people and culture first-hand will be an incredible experience. Also pray that our court appointment goes well on Wednesday and for our time with our little boy.

We’ll try to update the blog while we’re there, but some other AGCI friends who have been there this week had trouble accessing their blogs. If we’re not able to, we’ll be sure to update lots once we’re home! Thanks so much for following us on this journey and for supporting us along the way!

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Africa & Ethiopia, News | 3 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

{6 days}

July 24, 2010 – 7:25 PM

I feel like I’m so scatter-brained these days. There are about a hundred little details swirling in my head constantly and a long to-do list on my desk. We leave for Ethiopia in six days. SIX DAYS! I’m super excited about going, but it’s also a little nerve-wracking, too . . . especially the 15-hour plane ride part . . . ugh! (We’ll actually be on a plane for a total of 21 hours each way. Yikes!)

Our case manager called with some news yesterday that was a little disappointing. When we meet our little guy, he won’t be told that we’re his parents as originally planned. While we’re selfishly a little disappointed, we really do believe that it’s best for him. Basically it comes down to the fact that his little heart has been broken a lot recently, and he’s grieving everything (and everyone) he’s lost. The director at Hannah’s Hope made the decision, and we trust her judgment. She’s holding onto the photo album we made for him, and she’ll give it to him after we’ve officially passed court and are already back home. We truly want what’s best for him, so we’ll just go play with him and his little friends and make the most of our time together. Hopefully when we leave, he’ll miss the fun people that came to play with him for a few days and be excited when they tell him we’re his parents and that we’re coming back for him.

I’m going to miss Riley and Cole so much while we’re gone! We’ve traveled overseas without them before, and there’s just something about us both being in another country away from them that makes me a little uneasy. I guess that comes with the territory, though, and I know they’ll have a great time while we’re gone. I’ve made a little something for them to open each day so that they will hopefully feel as connected to us and what we’re up to as possible. We’ll also try to Skype with them while we’re away. Here’s part of what I’ve put together so far . . .

I hope you all are having a great weekend! Thanks to everyone who has sent donations for us to take to Hannah’s Hope! It’s been fun to get packages in the mail all week and add them to the collection!

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, Family | 5 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

summertime fun

July 21, 2010 – 4:23 PM

Yesterday some of the neighborhood kids (including our two) set up an impromptu lemonade stand. They made $11 in a matter of about an hour, so they each took away about $2. They were so proud of themselves! They were so cute that I had to take a few pictures right before they closed up shop . . .

It makes me a little sad that the boys will go back to school five days after we return from Ethiopia. The summer has FLOWN by, and I’m going to miss them and our laid-back schedule . . . {sniff, sniff}!

By Katie | Posted in Family | 3 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment

court update!

July 19, 2010 – 11:42 AM

Our case manager called this morning and said that court went well last night while we were sleeping! I’m so grateful for those of you who prayed on our behalf and more importantly on behalf of our little guy and his birth mom. Thank you so much!

Eleven days and counting! . . .

By Katie | Posted in Adoption, News | 2 comments Show Comments | Add a Comment